What a crazy weekend. I am glad I was able to start it on a peaceful note. I found my groove again, it turns out it was right next to the rut I was in. The busy days are always the best and the worst of the week.
We had our busy birthday party this week, which was fabulous, but I learned a big lesson in it. I will go back to all my parties at home. My darling trucker... he's just not so good for things like this. He means well, I'm sure, but I think he forgets which side of the party he is on. He is often just as excited as the kids are and when I'm doing a head count (which I do about a thousand times because I'm Paranoid) I end up counting him too!
Of course, if I can find him!
In the old days, before I had kids of my own, birthday parties were equally stressful. I tried to be helpful to my sister in law for her kids parties. Back then, it wasn't about wishing we were kids again, it was more like we still WERE. We would go out partying it up the night before and all of us would be struggling through the morning, completely hung over. The men were only found in the washroom, if they got out of bed at all before noon.
For parties at home, I have usually spent a few weeks beforehand researching games, finding pictures, posters, decorations to fit a theme, searching for the perfect shape cake to add to the event. The night before I get all the decorating done and any food prep I can fit in. The morning of, I get everything finished up, piece together the cake and I have time to have a long shower and a hot cup of coffee before worrying about any guests arriving. When someone shows up early, I am ready to throw open the door.
I stay in control of the party, calling in help (yelling out orders) as needed. Normally, by the time we get to cake and presents, the kids haven't had a boring moment. Having plans means that my house isn't destroyed in the process of kids playing, too.
For the trucker the night before, I will remind him again that he is not to make plans for the afternoon. I will remind him what time the party is and what time I expect him to be HERE and be READY. In the morning, he will almost always have somewhere he just HAS to go. He will offer to do my last minute shopping, but be too late getting back for me, so he gets off the hook for errands. This time, all I needed was tape so I could attach the last few balloons to the walls. I got it not more than 30 minutes before the party.
More than once at our event, I had to search for him. There was a perfect one to one adult/child balance, and yet him and his friend had no children in their care.
After the party? Oh, he is SOOOO exhausted and wants to go to bed early.
Are you kidding me?
Then, Sunday rolls around. I have birthday cake hangover and a sick baby girl who kept waking me up about every 30-45 minutes all night. I have a few work tasks to finish up and a big mess of dishes and wrapping paper to clean up.
No offer to help, no "hey hon, why don't you sleep in a bit longer since I went to bed early?" He got up and headed out again!!
As much as I want to throttle him right now... I will give him this in defense. He was there for the birthday party. He didn't send me off on my own. And today he did go and pick up steaks for dinner. He cooked dinner and that doesn't happen often.
Most weekends I live entirely like a single mom, even though I am not one. I have come to accept that. There are enough other things that I share as a parent and I do understand that hard long hours of a trucker mean that he tries to make the most of his weekends.
If I could make the steak come out like that myself...
I'd have to really think about things!